I dont know about Jesus...

But Laurie can microwave a burrito so hot that even he himself cannot eat it.

By The Way

That last post was a joke (I'm not really a parrot)

THIS IS WHO I AM

DONT EVER TRY TO CHANGE ME

Fuck You Assholes (except Gerald)

because hes the only one who comments nowdays

Why is this post pink?

I'm taking creative licence

Yitsel: why the fuck cant it be the weekend

Cameron: because its wednesday

Yitsel: fuck you wednesday
Yitsel: i hate you
Yitsel: youre all fucking high and mighty
Yitsel: coming around mid week
Yitsel: but guess what
Yitsel: YOURE ADOPTED

Dear Internet

I am not planning on buying anyone xmas presents, and in return I don't expect to get a present from anyone.

I hate christmas shopping, therefore I am only buying for my parents, niece and aunty.

Taking bets

Taking bets on whether or not I'll be arrested for that photo I posted below under the new terror laws.

I love you shorty

Dave: laurie laurie laurie your one sixteenth like dolly and 7.5/8ths macfoley

Thats it

The aircon hasnt accepted my truce, its time for all out Jihad.

Dear Air Conditioner

Dear Air Conditioner,

I realise how hot it is outside but can you please stop dripping on me? I would love to be able to sit under you in relative peace, and continue to decipher the badly written english in these fire engineering reports.

Maybe we can strike a truce?

I promise to stop turning you down so goddamn low and in return can you please stop the dripping.


Yours below,

Laurie.

Ahh Bray Park...

"is it the air conditioner above you laurie whats playing up?"

Its True

Craig: we need an adventure

Yitsel: word to that
Yitsel: i need some food
Yitsel: and an adventure
Yitsel: or a food adventure
Yitsel: whatever tickles my fancy

Craig: me too
i'm ready to kill and eat one fo the people i work with

WIN

the Idiot Savant (42% dark, 53% spontaneous, 42% vulgar)

your humor style: VULGAR | SPONTANEOUS | LIGHT You like things silly, immediate, and, above all, outrageous. Ixne on the subtle word play, more testicles on fire, please. People like you are the most likely to RECEIVE internet forwards--and also the most likely to save them in a special folder entitled 'HOLY SHIT'. Because it's so easily appreciated, and often wacky and physical, your sense of humor never ceases to amuse your friends. Most realize that there's a sly intelligence and a knowing wink to your tastes. Your sense of humor could be called 'anti-pretentious'--but paradoxically enough, that indicates you're smarter than most. PEOPLE LIKE YOU: Johnny Knoxville - Jimmy Kimmel The 3-Variable Funny Test! - it rules - If you're interested, try my latest: The Terrorism Test

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 28% on darkness You scored higher than 73% on spontaneity You scored higher than 58% on vulgarity

Link: The 3 Variable Funny Test written by jason_bateman on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Is it that hard to learn the english language?

So I walked into work this morning and asked Mel something, and instead of replying with "possibly" she said "possibility".

And then she just updated Nabils resume for me, and instead of saying "its been updated" she said "its been upgraded".

GOOD LORD

Oh and instead of saying "that" she says "what".

Eg "Laurie remember that report what I emailed you?".