Spamming KoC Players

So i thought i'd jump on the KoC spam wagon, spamming people to become my officers. Heres the message I've been sending out.

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Hi I'm yitsel,

Please read this message, I'm sure you will find it highly relevant.


I'm currently recruiting officers for my command chain.

when you become my officer you will receive the following benefits:


1. A FREE peanut
2. A FREE french bread stick coated in your choice of dip (currently only mexican salsa and hommus are available)
3. FALSE PROMISES to protect you and your army when you are targetted
4. A TRAINED MONKEY which is trained to play kings of chaos, resulting in your account being attended 24 HOURS A DAY (diapers not included)


Why join Us:
Hell, ISNT THE MONKEY ENOUGH? You get the peanut, the french bread stick with your CHOICE of dip, the FALSE PROMISES, AND the MONKEY for the simple task of switching commanders to myself.

I'll even throw in a briefcase in which you can keep the monkey when you wish to play KoC yourself

Your next step:
Think About it... do you want your VERY OWN MONKEY, complete with FALSE PROMISES?

This is what you do:
1. Click My name.
2. Click "Make yitsel my commander!"
3. Eagerly wait outside your house for your mailman to deliver your very own TRAINED KOC PLAYING MONKEY, COMPLETE WITH BREAD STICK, PEANUT and FALSE PROMISES


Please note that while all proper precautions will be taken, there is no guarantee that the monkey will not eat the peanut and breadstick while in transit.