My experience of D-Day & the rest of my weekend

Friday Night -
Friday night I rocked up to Nyes house ready to head out with him, Brucey & Shorty. When I got there the boys were already drunk, and I was after some spumante so I took Shorty & Brucey down to the bottle-o. Now Shorty was already quite drunk at this stage after consuming 3/4 of a bottle of wine that Nye had opened, leaving poor Nye with only 1/4 of his bottle. Shorty proceeded to buy a bottle of vodka.

After arriving back at Nye's house Shorty poured himself a drink. Fair enough. But after he was half finished this drink he topped it up with vodka. I laughed. Then being half finished that he topped it up with more vodka. Ok it was time for intervention. I yelled an flailed my arms at the drunk man to slow his drinking down, otherwise hes gonna either be too drunk to get in anywhere once we finally leave, or hes gonna yack everywhere once we finally do go somewhere. My my how I was wrong.

We left after about an hour after I got there, after Nye and I consumed 2 bottle of Spumante, we made Brucey call a cab and lo and behold it was there in 2 minutes.

Jumping in the cab we headed off to France, because we were heading to Normandy. Or so Shorty thought. Anyway we headed to the Normanby, which Nye was telling me is like a trendy place that has good music and is suave and stuff, and that I'd really like it. How wrong he was.

Arriving at the Normanby we walked up to the bouncer, each presenting our respective IDs. After repeated attempts to slip Brucey up (who wasnt all that drunk), the bouncer let all of us in (including shorty the drunk bastard), and we headed to the bar. Nye was completely wrong. The Normanby is just like any other city club/pub with the top 40 blaring and the drunk teeny boppers dancing etc etc.

Anyway drinking was had and eventually shorty headed off to the toilet, but not before dropping a glass of water I gave to him on the floor. This was the last we saw of shorty that night. After him being gone about 10 minutes I headed into the toilet to see if he was ok. He was nowhere to be seen. Calling his mobile I asked him where he was.
"I'm at the Normandy!" shorty slurred.
"Come back to the place we were before" I answered
"I'm at the Normandy!" shorty slurred once more.
at about that point in time I cut our losses and hung up on him. He was too wasted to take to the valley anyway and would have been more of a liability than anything else.

So finally we leave the hellhole known as the Normanby (hell I may as well rename it to the Normandy cos its as hellish as june 6 1944) me nye and brucey headed out to the cab rank to catch a cab to the valley. We successfully hailed one and were about to get in when we get these guys asking us where we're going. Apparantly they were heading to the valley too and wanted to pool up.
"How much money have you got?" Nye asked the guys.
(drunk guys pause for a few seconds)
"Fucken nerd!" exclaimed one of them
"Four eyes!" came a remark from his dirty skank
So we left those rude fucks behind waiting for a cab which they couldnt pay for. suckers...

Anyway we headed to the valley. Going to the beer garden first, we spotted the girls that Nye was chatting up at the Normanby. They continued on to the Empire and Nye said we'd meet them there.

At the empire we headed for the balcony and Nye went in search of his women. After Nye returned without them, a bartender came round selling these shots that were frangelico & lychee liquer. They were delicious.

Nye finally found his girls and set to work on one of them once more. They went for a dance and nye and i continued to drink (im starting to get bored of writing this as you can probably tell). Then we went for a crazy dance and went home.


Saturday Night -
Meakin sends me a message asking me what I'm up to
I call meakin
Meakin arrives at 8:30
we ponder what to do
we finally decide to go to Figjams place
We call figjam on the way - no answer
we call figjam again - no answer
we call their home number - no answer
At the top of their street I call chirpys mobile - he answers HOORAY
he tells us he JUST got home from work. I tell him thats lucky cos we're at the top of his street.
he suggests we go to the RE for a game of pool.
Chirpy goes to get ready.
Meakin bums a cigarette off Michele.
I tell meakin that hes meant to be quitting.
Meakin rambles something about addiction.
We go to the RE.
Meakin uses his hick saying "thanks geezer" to the bouncer who thinks he says "thanks loser" and I tell meakin to stop saying geezer cos its a shit saying and only people in rockhampton say it.
We order a jug of bundy
we admire the view
we go see if we can play pool
we cant play pool cos theres a function on
we go get another jug
we head back to chirpys and take some smirnoff ice blacks for the road
chirpy makes us pizza and we watch alien vs predator
we cream our pants over the fight scenes
we drink
we eat pizza
we go home
THE END

sorry that night couldnt have been as detailed as friday night but i mean fuck whos gonna read all of this anyway?